You know what is funny? You go to school for 13 years, waiting for the day that you graduate highs school ready to start your life as an adult. But, the thing is, i never thought about what i wanted to do with that adult life of mine. I don't know if it's just me, but when I graduated high school i was only 18 years old... how many 18 year olds honestly know what they want to be doing 20 years from then? At the time i didn't think much of it... but here I am, my Junior year of college and I'm just now figuring out what I want.
I always knew that i wanted to be a wife and a mom. Those things were just "givens" for my future. However, i never spent much time thinking about what i wanted to pursue when i got the opportunity to get out in the real world. The first thing i can ever remember wanting to be while i was growing up was an actress, and now after hearing stories and watching home videos, i feel like the little drama queen prissy 4 year old girl that i was could have easily made it in the hollywood world. However, now that it's 16 years later i see this wasn't a realistic dream. So, thinking back to the first realistic thing i ever wanted to be, it would have been a doctor. Even since i was little I've wanted to help people. But then i got a little older and learned that as a doctor i would have to deal with lots of blood and other things that didn't exactly make me feel too good! That quickly made being a doctor out of the question for this girl. After that, i honestly never really thought about what else i wanted to do. I know my mom and I had talked about sonography before, but that was when i was 16 so i never did much research on the possibilities. Then that day came, in 2009 when i received my diploma and every one you talked to asked, "What are you going to major in at college?" This question was so stressful to me, because honestly i didn't know. Finally, i had to make a decision, so for some reason i chose education. Most people can't wait to get out of school and here i was going to school just so i could graduate and go teach at a school for the rest of my life. It didn't make sense, but i just acted like i was content and excited about my decision. Being around all the people who were majoring in Elementary Education as well made me see that this was not my calling in life. The way they all talked about it made me envious. They were so excited about all the possibilities they would have being teachers. They all definitely had a passion for teaching that i lacked. I knew i needed to make a change. I thought about all the options there were and decided i definitely wanted to do something where i interacted with people, and that longing for wanting to help people still existed for me. This is when i thought that Psychology was the major that made the most sense. You definitely interact with people and the whole reason for psychology is to help people, i thought this would be so perfect for me. I'm not going to lie, i think psychology is beyond interesting. Learning how the human mind works and why people act the way they do is just fascinating, but once again, i was lacking that passion. I decided that i was just settling, not being willing to push myself to do something i would enjoy and find rewarding. I told my mom that i thought that it was crazy that my reasoning behind becoming a psychology major had been the fact that i wanted to help people... ridiculous, right? You don't have to have a degree in psychology to help people. You can help people with a degree in nothing. So i did a lot of research, praying, and waiting.
Now, i will no longer be attending TTU... i will be transferring to a community college here in chattanooga, Chattanooga State University. I did research and guess what they have an amazing program for?? Sonography.
Thats right, the career my mom suggested and thought i would enjoy ended up popping back into my life. The only thing is, before i can even begin the sonography program i have to have at least and Associates in Applied Science of Radiology. So that means it will be two years before i can even start the sonography program. So it's a little discouraging because i feel like i'm just starting all over when in reality i should be graduating in a year and a half. But it's okay, i am very happy about my decision and i am so exited about all that i am going to have the opportunity to learn! Now they have 4-D ultra sounds!! How cool is that!?
I feel like it's been a long road to get to the place where i know what i want, but it's a road that i am very thankful for! If you never make the wrong decision, how are you ever going to learn anything new? When Thomas Edison first attempted to invent the light bulb and didn't succeed, did he give up? No. And in the end, after he accomplished his goal, this is what he said: " I did not fail, i just found 10,000 ways that wont work."
So for me, i didn't fail... i just found two career paths that i didn't want to take. Thats what growing up is all about, living and learning.
:)
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